Month: February 2018

Progress, not perfection

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That’s a tough one for me.  You see, if I get 99% on the test of life, I will skim over that accomplishment and focus on the 1% I got wrong.  I know perfection is an elusive concept, but it doesn’t stop me from always trying to attain it.  That is where I find myself right now.  I have recently reached 2 big milestones, but I am spending my time and energy focused on how much further I have yet to go.  Do any of you do the same thing, or is it just me?  For your sake, I hope it’s just me.

As I mentioned in early blog posts, I broke my wrist in December and had to have follow-up bone cancer scans in January (from my biopsy scare in October).  The great news is my cast is off and my follow-up scans came back clear!!  Instead of savoring that news, I am now focusing on how far I have to go to get back strength and range of motion in my stiff and achy wrist and the fact that my cancer doctor wants to do yet another complete set of follow-up cancer scans in 3 more months, to be sure I am indeed all clear.  Don’t get me wrong, I am thrilled my cast is finally off and I am even more thrilled my January scans came back clear!!  Why can’t I just rest there for a while?  Instead, I’m on to the next thing that must be accomplished and must be accomplished right now.  Would I treat a friend this way?  Is that advice I would offer to a loved one?  No!  If a friend came to me with this perfectionistic attitude, I would tell her she should be so proud of all she’s already done and that trying to be perfect is not something to strive for, unless never succeeding is her top priority.  She needs to remember that that same strength that has gotten her this far will continue to carry her through all she has yet to complete.  That sounds like pretty good advice, doesn’t it?  Maybe I will try viewing myself through the eyes I use for those I love.  After all, shouldn’t we be kind to and love ourselves?  If perfection is something you struggle with, maybe you should give that perspective a try too.  Let’s all agree to begin viewing ourselves through a lens of grace.  Ahh, I feel lighter already.

 

Perspective is everything

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There is a lyric in a song by American Authors that says “This is gonna be the best day of my life.”  It is meant as an upbeat sentiment, but that really depends on your perspective.  During some of my tough days, when I am waiting for test results, in a lot of pain, or particularly concerned with what the future may hold, I think “what if this is as good as my life will ever be?  What if I get bad news tomorrow, and this is the best day of what life I have left?  What if this is gonna be the best day of my life?”  I am not always in this place, but if I’m being perfectly honest, I have thought it more than once.

On the other hand, there are those days where you wake up refreshed and excited about what this day will hold.  Maybe you’re on vacation, in the early stages of a new relationship, or feeling particularly healthy and strong.  Your future looks bright and you feel unstoppable.  In this case, “this is gonna be the best day of my life” means something totally different.  That got me thinking about how the exact same words or the exact same life experiences can feel vastly different based solely on our perspective.  And that perspective, to a great degree, is our choice.  It helps me to see it as a choice because then I am not a victim in this experiment called life, I am a participant.  So, the next time I find myself worrying that this may be the best day of my life, I am going to try to remember my perspective is my choice.  Then, maybe, I can choose to sing along with American Authors that “this is gonna be the best day of my life!”